Ah forgiveness, what does it really mean? Or should it be what forgiveness is not! Having gone through many trials in my life forgiving others has always been a burning flame inside me. I struggle with why can’t I just forgive and move on well because I was confusing forgiving with forgetting. I have a certain someone in my life that I can’t seem to just forgive and move on, probably because I see the other person not really remorseful for what they did. Reality check: Forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting about it or excusing one’s behavior. Forgiveness is not a feeling otherwise I would never feel like giving it. A lot of strength is required when forgiving someone meaning you recognize the pain and hurt while owning it. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you try to act like it never happened in the first place. Forgiveness also doesn’t mean you have to reconcile with the person who hurt you because you can forgive without trying to establish a relationship. Forgiveness isn’t based on what the other person’s actions were to you. Most importantly it’s not based on conditions which means “if only they would do something for me, then I might forgive them. Forgiving doesn’t mean you have to trust someone because that will come with time. So if you are in the same boat try to remember, do this for yourself and don’t let someone else determine whether you can forgive them or not. Letting go of the hurt and pain even if the other person doesn’t achknowlede that what they did was wrong because judgement day comes for all of us in some form or another and for me I want peace. Peace knowing it’s ok to forgive and yet move on from the person that hurt you, if you can forgive and trust again obviously that would be a good thing for whomever you are foriving but reality isn’t always that way. I have beat myself up over this issue many times in my life and I am working on it but it will feel so good when I can give myself that awesome gift of forgiveness.